priestmahad:

whites love to bring up things like how irish people were slaves or how they were oppressed in america in the early 1900s. but then i’m like….by who? who oppressed these people? other white people lmfao. so why are you getting mad at POC because you got oppressed….. BY OTHER white people lmfao. bye

thorsbian:

Burglar, when i surprise him by slithering upstairs in my pj’s at 11am on a tuesday: i thought the place was empty…

Me: i have a hectic work schedule

Burglar: understandable, but now i have to kill u (sees my shirt that says “what’s your sign?” and is legally obligated to answer) im a virgo

Me: oh really? This doesnt seem like a virgo heavy career, whats your rising?

Burglar, a little embarrassed: uh idk

Me: thats ok! If u know your time/place of birth, we can look up your birthchart!! Youre about to learn sooo much about yourself

Burglar, pulling up the chair beside me:

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